Thursday, February 5, 2009

Thank you...

Thank God for friends. Friends who really "get" you. They make trying and difficult times, well, not easy, but livable at least one day at a time. Why are there people who understand and know you so much you don't even have to utter a single word and they know what you're going through? And they're miles away from you! Compare the people who breathe the same stench of the workplace and are oblivious to your situation. I can't blame them. All of us have problems. All of us have things to tend to - our families, our careers, our ambitions, our frustrations, our emotions. That's why I am truly grateful that there are still friends who care enough to listen and give intelligent advice when you need it most.

I am plagued with so many questions right now. Like Meryl Streep's character at the end of her current Oscar-nominated movie, I have doubts - such doubts! Not just with the system. Not just with judgments and decisions made. But at myself. Doubts with my capabilities. Doubts with my self-worth. Doubts with my clout. It's one thing to be punished for a wrongdoing and to learn the lessons that go with it. But to be castrated without the benefit of reason and purpose is humiliating and debilitating. I feel so useless right now. My crippled spirit is barely breathing.

That's why I thank God for friends who "get" me. They give clarity to a muddled mind. Hope to an injured enthusiasm. They don't beat around the bush. They don't condescend or patronize you. Because that's what I really need right at this moment: The Truth.